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Do I have Borderline Personality Disorder?

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jeweles	Do I have Borderline Personality Disorder?	Lead	[-]
Posts: 1 (10/10/08 22:59:04) Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts Report Post	Tags : borderline, personality, disorder, diagnosis I was diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder 6 weeks ago trough a psychological assessment. It concluded that I did in fact have BPD. How accurate is the diagnosis from this type from a psychological assessment? My psychologist states that he does not think I have it. I see him on a weekly basis for over two years now. Wouldn't he know if anyone did? From what I'm seeing im on the borderline of having the disorder...i just do not know how severe the symptoms have to be. Can anyone on here help me understand if I classify for the symptoms below? Main questions Self mutilation I have cut myself three times, twice after diagnosis. I knew this was a symptom of BPD so I tried it to see if it helped. It did.-Twice was after the diagnosis. I only did this because nothing has helped for the pain. Is this enough to classify for one of the DSM requirements? Idealization/Devaluation -(as extreme as i get) my psychologist canceled on me once and immediately i began to feel like he did not care-or he looks at his watch and im thinking ok i know im boring so i should just leave so my therapist doesnt have to listen to me; i did leave. he asked if i wanted to leave b/c i picked my keys up which is a sign to him i dont want to talk anymore. i was thinking he thinks im so boring so i wont put him through this any longer. Does this classify as one of the DSM requirements? Self image/sense of self (im fairly certain this would qualify) i think of myself very negatively. i may think im so stuipd, i hate myself, i may think im just a bad person at times, sometimes i think it would be best for everyone if i stay to myself and not be around anyone. ive always felt like i was not aware of who iam as a person as one should be. Does this count as one of the DSM requirements? Impulsive (no question about it-i have this symptom) spending, wreckless driving,binge eating, substance abuse Sucidal Behavior I think mentally all the time i wish i was just dead, ive had plans before but did not follow through, once i did make a threat to my father that i was going to kill myself, docs ask if im sucidal and my response is i do think about it but would not follow through with sucide- Does this count as one of the DSM requirements??? Affective instability due to marked reactivity of mood not even sure what this one means-but i do have mood swings. i get really down very quickly-very sad. i sometimes get mad for no good reason. i can be very irritable at times. i can have extreme anxiety at times. shaking hands, ibs acts up at this point typically, cant think very clearly. Very sensitive to rejection also. Does this count as one of the DSM requirements??? Chronic feeling of emptiness I have Difficulty controlling anger not typically-rarely i do get mad at times for no good reason. other times i should get mad but dont Is this a DSM requirement??? I have no paranoid ideation or dissociative symptoms. If you count the symptoms im on the borderline of having enough symptoms for BPD. i may have BPD-i just do not know if some of my symptoms classify for a symptom of BPD. Please answer these questions. I know it may take a minute but I truly need to know do if I have this so I can receive the appropriate treatment. Please answer all the above questions. I know whatever you tell me does not take the place of what my doctors tell me. I know you are not responsible in any way. I'm truly just trying to understand this so i can get the appropriate treatment. I have ordered a couple books to try and gain a better understanding of Borderline Personality Disorder but I would like some input about my specific symptoms. From what I read there are many different symptoms so I'm trying to understand if my symptoms really classify as one of the various DSM requirements. Is poor memory a manifestation of BPD? Is poor pronunciation of words a manifestation of BPD? Please Help. I do have an appointment with a psychiatrist in a couple weeks. And I also know any advice given here will not take the place of my psychiatrist advice. Please do let me know: Do you think my symptoms classify as borderline personality disorder? Each and every one of them. Thanx-very much
yoyogirl1957		#1	[-]
Posts: 9 (10/11/08 00:02:06) Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts Report Post	Hi jewels. I'm glad you posted. It sure seems like you fit BPD to me but then again like you already said, you have to be diagnosed by a therapist and psychiatrist that you respect to believe it yourself. As for me, I do trust my instincts as far as therapists. I had one social worker who kept a fixed grin on her face even though I was talking about sad stuff. It really unnerved me and so I told my psychiatrist that I was getting another therapist. He got mad at me, saying any therapist would do. Like one size sock fits all! So I got rid of him. Now I have a great psychiatrist and a really good therapsit who is fully engaged in our converstation and does not look bored one single minute. I went 32 years in counseling/therapy before I was properly diagnosed. A lot of therapists only feel comfortable using the same approaches that they were trained in when they were students so they won't even consider DBT. But if you want a no nonsense therapy that cuts through all the crap of touchy-feely, let's spend countless hours talking about my self-pity and how it feels to be sad, etc and gets to the root of the problem then you might like DBT. If you want, you can find a therapist who uses DBT (Dialectical Behavioral Therapy) with BPD patients and get a second opinion. I spent 32 years doing the whole "Talk" therapy, yak, yak yak, "woe is me" and never once got any better as a result of it. Within two months of DBT therapy my husband (of 13 years) was like "wow, you are actually improving!" As far as the cutting, I stopped that for good when I started my DBT group 2 years ago. I've had low moments when it crossed my mind but then I was like "OMG, that's sick, I don't want to do that" In my opinion, cutting is a vicious spiral downward to insanity. I hope you decide not to get caught up in that. Be good to yourself, you deserve it!
jeweles		#2	[-]
Posts: 3 (10/11/08 00:09:23) Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts Report Post	Thanx for your reply. Do you know of any ways to help pay for DBT? I'm a college student and my insurance will not cover DBT. That is if I do have BPD. I'm working on the second opinion right now. In the meantime I think this forum should be very helpful. So people please do continue sending your opinions my way. After all we all have personal experience with BPD. Who better to ask?
horsebdsu		#3	[-]
Posts: 1304 (10/12/08 17:19:22) Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts Report Post	Hi, DBT, finally, has become a fad. Check at your local (county/city run) mental health center to see if they offer it. They will usually offer it to you based on a sliding scale if you live in the covered area. I wouldn't worry too much about what you are diagnosed as. Personally I hate having the BPD label, but accept that it is my dx for now. What is important is getting the therapy and meds to get better? Coming here can also help.
aprileyes		#4	[-]
Posts: 6 (10/17/08 01:48:17) Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts Report Post	jeweles lol about the fad! i suppose that could be a good thing or a bad thing. once it hit oprah it was all over i guess. favorite book of the month... favorite drug of the month... favorite excuse of the month... only this time, it's no excuse. it's actually there and not going away. if a doctor subscribes medicine for a person with the flu, and a person with the flu goes to get medicine somewhere on their own, do they both have the flu??? good on you for coming to this site! im proud of you!
Ravynn		#5	[-]
Posts: 8 (01/11/09 03:48:44) Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts Report Post	Jeweles- I dont' have a degree, but I've studdied psychological disorders and have done DBT for BPD. Not everyone in my group had a diagnosis- because even if they had some of the thoughts and behviours, they were not necessarily BPD. Some people have (very justified) difficulty coping with extreme amounts of stress, but for people with BPD, any stress feels like an extreme amount. It takes more than a few instances to meet criteria, because personality d/os are by definition rigid cognitive and behavioural patterns. If you find you really identify with certain criteria, DBT could really help you and I would encourage you to discuss it more with your therapist. If those properties do not characterise your life, chances are you aren't fully BPD (but DBT could still help). When impulsive behaviours (binge drinking/eating, over spending, promiscuous sex), self-mutiliation, extremist thinking (eg you're utterly worthless because your therapist wants to end the session, or he is a horrible person for not caring enough to continue speaking/listening) are your daily routine and override most of your other activities, that's definitely BPD. It comes on varying scale, like depression and anxiety- some symptoms, or the entire disorder, is more or less intense for different people. It's good to have your struggles recognized and shared- this is a good place to read what other experiences are like and get feedback for your own, and most of all, support and encouragement. I hope you access to something that really helps you- and if that means a diagnosis, then yes. But be careful of just using a label- make sure you know what it means to you, otherwise other people won't understand the true content of the word. ha. Oprah. I have to say, I'm ambivalent about my opinion on that.....<==does that classify as a DSM requirement? (i hope you guys get that joke- i'm not trying to be a depreicating jerk, i just deal with things through sardonic humour)
hmssws		#6	[-]
Posts: 2 (02/21/09 15:01:46) Reply Quote More My Recent Posts Message Me Connection Blocking Invite Ignore User's Posts Report Post	I am wondering many of the same things about myself.....I intend to begin looking for help Monday though....we'll see where it leads, but my lif is cetainly in a shambles as a result of whatever is going on with me.

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